Rip Van Winkle

I know what he felt like, Rip Van Winkle. To wake one day, and have everything changed. But not just that, but to be enjoying your time, and suddenly wake to find that everything is different from how it once was.

I remember this little girl who used to have a specific bed time routine. The routine was simple. Bath, dry off, brush teeth, in room, lotion, pajamas, book time, light off, story time, potty time, into bed for one last story, turn on music, a little cuddle, and off to sleep. Almost all of these things were done by Mommy or Daddy as Tahlia would attempt to dash around the room, or, sometimes, stand still while we did what we needed.

And it is now, as if I have been standing still, and she has run ahead.

It must have been while I was asleep. It must have been months. I don't remember, but suddenly, a new little girl started running around. Maybe it was not so sudden, maybe it happened in steps, but I just didn't realize.

Bath time routine changed. I remember how she started to want to pick out her own face cloth. She started wanting to climb into the tub by herself. She wanted to start climbing out of the tub without help. She wanted to turn off the light by herself, sometimes with her hand, sometimes with her foot. These changes didn't seem so great; these changes just seemed like small steps forward.

But more happened too. No longer did we pick the pajamas, but now we set out three pair in front of her so that she could decide on the one she wanted. Sometimes they would match, but not other times. She'd pick the books she wanted to read. It all seemed to change.

The magnitude of these changes crashed down upon me one night when Mommy and I were putting Tahlia down. It was one of those rare moments when Asher was already asleep so that Mommy and I could be alone with Tahlia. We had read books, told stories, pee-peed on the potty, and had just finished her last story. Now it was time to turn on the music. I started to head over to the radio by myself when Tahlia shouts out, "I do it." This was something new, and I paused and looked at Mommy. She just gave me a knowing look as if to say, "Yeah, she does it."

Tahlia hopped out of bed, walked over to the radio, pushed the correct button five times to start the music, and headed back to bed. It was nothing to her. A nightly routine executed.

You attempt to capture and hold each moment with your children so that you never forget, but at some time, they move too quickly. They grow too fast. I once believed that I knew everything about her, but now, as she quickly heads back to her bed, I realize that she is growing so quickly. The catch-22 of the situation is apparent. I want her to grow up and explore this world, but I also want her to slow down, so I can enjoy her.

So I give her a hug, tell her to have sweet dreams and remind her that I love her. Maybe tonight I won't sleep; I'm sure Asher will help me with this plan.